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Its beginning to look a lot like Christmas...

2005-12-19 -- 4:15 p.m.

So why don't I feel anything?

An age-old issue, the pressures of the holiday season. The need to feel joyful, and special because its the beginning of december and Jesus's birthday, though I'm pretty sure Jesus has nothing to do with it anymore.

The thing is, I just dont feel it this year. And I'm trying to tell myself that that is ok! Not every christmas will be enchanting. And why don't I feel anything..its obvious just not happy with myself or my life at the present time.

My job is not glamerous and barely holds my interest. And I've been mostly single for all of 2005, besides for some brief relationships.

I don't hate my job...just not jazzed, and I've had a great year, a necessary year, a re-grouping year!

For some reason this holiday season seems to be highlighting these two current failures in my life. The rest of the year I seem to go along my way.

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